Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Randomize
