Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?

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(407): View more from Florida

You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.

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(586): View more from Michigan

just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.

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(616): View more from Michigan

They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar

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(270): View more from Kentucky

my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom

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(602): View more from Arizona

LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!

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