I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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