There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
