There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize