My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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