my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
