Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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