Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
