It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
