remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
i've created a new STD.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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