You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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