Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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