I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
