Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
