True but thats because hes a fetus.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
