Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Can I color on your dick again?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize