I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
