imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize