Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
