i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize