I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
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