actually, I'm a sock model
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
either way he was missing a nipple.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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