just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Who did Billy Mays play for?
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Is it because I queefed?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Randomize
