I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
last night I used snow as a chaser
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