Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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