I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
