So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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