I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
