Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
