couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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