The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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