i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
