it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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