Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Someone shit on the floor
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I am mentally ready for anal.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
