I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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