When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
