i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Randomize
