I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
