In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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