no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Randomize
