I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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