Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Randomize
