Little spoons don't ask big questions
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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