It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
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