Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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