you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
