anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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