lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
She told me I should be a condom model.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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