Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
