Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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