it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize