It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
